Leap of Faith

Leap of faith

When you have children you worry about raising them up to adults.
You worry about health, you worry about drugs, you worry about education.
Then they make it to adulthood. Marrying, having children of their own.
Most think that is it, and life goes on and so does theirs. And that is
true for most cases.

About 19 years ago, we had Desert Storm. And my son who is in the
Reserves, called to tell me that he had put his name on the list to go.
That he was now on the 24 hour stand by list. Meaning that he had to be ready
to go within 24 hours. We talked about him going, and how he had
everything taken care of. And I was doing well with all this news. As
those parents of Reserves or Regular Armed Services do... and then
he said... and I got my will taken care of today. A tear rolls down the
cheek, one by one, slowly... and you are glad you are on phone, and
you quietly say ok, and he said, Love ya, Mom, got to go. Love you too,
is your answer...... as this take a leap of faith.

This year, my baby... my 39 year old baby, tells me she has bought a
motorcycle.(Deep breath).. hoping she takes her classes she talks
about, after her son graduation. Yes, it is... (ok.... another deep breath)
I saw the bike, seems small and innocent enough. She does well with
her classes, and seems to have deep respect for the bike. Then another
call. She sees a bike on Criagslist. A Harley Davidson. Pink with flames.
(I know in my heart she is getting it) And yes, she does. And she brings
it by a week later. It is a beautiful bike and her smile is from ear to ear.

And as she leaves my driveway each time, so happy with her Harley,
I am happy for her but I pray her deceased father will watch over her.

And it is another HUGE LEAP OF FAITH.

Ah, Silence...

Ah, Silence....

No more elections talk. No more election TV ads.
No more phone calls for different candidates.

Did the many items pass in Spokane?
Did the jail pass in Cda?
Did the water dept. in Sandpoint pass?
Which was an unfair ballot, as Sandpoint water
is in Ponderay as well as Kootenai, and neither
town got to vote on that. A good question is why?
After all we are stuck with the higher bill with out
choices, where Sandpoint decides our fate.

Ah peace and quiet... I hope

"update" maybe not so quiet in Coeur d'Alene.

Points...mileages, and rewards....

You have seen those points they keep trying to get you
to add and then cash in for rewards.

The airlines have them.
Hallmark has them, your credit card has them.
Even the banks are getting in on this point thing.


See you spend money, get points.
Use your bank card, get points.
Use your Hallmark card, get points.
Fly everywhere...get points or mileage.

The only downside of all of this, at least for me..
has been that I usually have anywhere from 200
to 1000 points... and the lowest of low rewards
are starting at 10,000. So this seem like a worthless
deal.

Last break-a-way of 2009

We took some time to ourselves this weekend... went to near Lewiston to do
some steelhead fishing...well, the King did... I read a book and Misty did some
checking things out... and this is some of the views we saw...
This is looking down on Lewiston from the Lewiston Grade.We found this little roadside area that we parted right by the river...

As Misty and I walked the shore, we found a few things... one being this jaw.
It was very thin.... don't know what it belong to.

Just left of center you can see someone sitting on the shore line.

this was near a boat ramp. And there was a nice hole there in the water...

supposely where fish like to hide... well, they did that well.

Lo, and behold, that person sitting waiting patiencely for the evasive fish was....

the King. Not looking very happy.... but he had fun.

Looking down the river.....

looking up the river

We were down in a hole like... and the sun shone up on the hills around us...

This is the jawbone we found...don't know what it belongs to

This is one of the catch and release fish that didn't make it... the wild ones are catch

and release while the hatchery ones are keepers... that is if you are luck enough to

get some... which the campers above us were... they got 2 for the day.
We saw 4 of these laying on the shore in different stages of rot..

Some more of the view.... we are a very lucky country... and especially those

of us in Idaho

I love rocks... of different colors and shapes... usually bring some home, to

the King's disgust... but if I had my way, all of these would have been in the camper

before I left... I could use them in my gardens... but I was kind this time.

So you see, I only took pictures this time.. well, I did sneak a couple small ones

in my pocket, but not this one.

of course a trip isn't without our Misty... and she was so polite as you can

see with her table manners



Did some one say dessert???

.

Happy Halloween.....

BOO

can you tell who it is???

Flying again....

We have been informed that our kids are kidnapping us next February,
in honor of my forth coming 70's birthday in April. We don't know where
we are going but ......it entails, flying.

With the new policies (and yes, I have flown several times since the
strip show of Homeland Security) and then add on top of this.. the biggest
fear of any passenger....inattentive pilots.... we hear about the TWO
inattentive pilots, who took off their headphones (WHY???) to discuss
schedules. Isn't this up there with text messaging while driving? Although,
if they were text messaging, then they would have got the message,
that they over shot the airport. BY OVER A 100 MILES!!.

This wasn't always the case. I flew out of Providence, R.I. in 1958, on my
first flight, to Florida. Considering I only left R.I. once in my life... and rarely left Newport
County in a car, that was a leap of faith.Especially raised with a mother whose
thoughts were, if God wanted us to fly... he would have gave us wings on our
bodies. But at 18, one is brave.

Then I flew from the West Coast to the East Coast so many times, I
can't remember... but it sure was over 20 times. Even when one time
there was a water leak, that didn't shake my thoughts of flying. I knew
O'Hara like the freeways of our area... And knew if I flew in on one side,
I was guaranteed that I was flying out of the other side, 2 stories difference.
I knew the subway, the stairs and how to do it the fastest. So flying
was no big deal...

And hopefully, I remember those feelings come February. Because right
now, I am wondering...Do you think when I enter the plane, if I ask the pilot
if he is going to be paying attention all the time, he will be insulted?

Neither man nor beast

Well, with the rain coming down the road, filling in
the ditches, this is not fit for man nor beast..

The cat snuggled in a nice warm spot. The dog's
pad with a shirt that is there. And the dog has found
one of us to lay down next to us as we watch tv or read
a book.
And on a mission of duty outside. She ran as close to
the house as possible.
One time the King took her out and put her down
on the lawn mid way and she shot back to the
house with ears flopping. She was having no
part of that. Too bad dogs aren't litter trained too.

I have caught up on some of my magazines.
Down to one and then I have the two books.
I have the Kennedy book and also have Mitch
Albom's book ..have a little faith it is a true story.
I like Albom's books.

So snuggle in all of you... winter is coming.
Luckily it isn't snowing down here yet!.

Subjects that didn't make the cut...

When I come up with an idea for a post, I have to
write it down right away... or at least a small part of
it. So later when I have the time, I can flush them out
to a post for the day.

So I end up with notes here and there...
Use to have a spot called blog ideas, but had to write them
on paper, because the computer isn't always around.

So here is a few that didn't make the cut...

Bored women should not have access to power tools.
This was going to be how I have gotten in trouble with
power tools and my projects. Because power tools have
let me tear things apart that I haven't necessarily gotten
back together. Some things sometimes come apart easier
than they go back together. The King hates that. If he had
his way, I would never have access to power tools.

Characters that I raised my children with.
This was going to be some of the characters that
came into my life during child rearing years. And
their influence on the kids.

Old sayings that keep coming back around.
This was going to be some sayings I hear now, that
I first heard as a kid.

Fool me once, what a shame....
Fool me twice, shame on you....
Fool me three times, shame on me...

What goes around, comes around.

And my favorite since I was 8...
I don't get mad, I get even....

The first two have possibilities so they might make it yet.

Train going thru Sandpoint

There is a man name Pete, who shared his pictures that he took in Sandpoint, of the
recent passing thru of the steam train returning to Portland Oregon. My understanding
he took these pictures from his boat.
As it passed thru the land of emails... I was honored to be one of the ones who was
on the receiving end.

I don't know who you are, Pete, but thank you so much for sharing with us all.

GRIEVING...WHEN IS IT TIME?

Too soon? when then?
and who judges when?

This is not about anyone in particular. It could be written by you,
or me. anyone who has lost a spouse.
Well, I am writing it but with several people in mind. As
it has happen to many.

Losing one's spouse is devastating. Especially when it is
sudden. Heart attack? car accident? no good byes, lots of
feelings to sort out. Leaving one in a spin for at least a year.
Some even more.

Then there is the ones where you do have good byes. Years.
Those who are sick a very long time. The spouse/caretaker,
lives it every day, day in and day out. Especially if the sick one
is at home all that time. Even with outside help, the caretaker
is on duty 24/7. Day after day of stress, that those who have
not gone thru it, don't really understand.

The caretaker loves their spouse. Almost more than life.
They get tired but they wouldn't have it any other way.
It is their desire to do a good job of taking care of the
love one... after all the vows say "til death do us part".
Their life and body is wound in the sickness. And sometimes
it takes the caretaker. They will pass before the spouse.

When finally the end comes. The caretaker is left empty.
The tightly wound life, is all of sudden gone. Leaving the
spouse/caretaker suspend in a void, that once was so full, that
there were not even moments alone. Then the duty to
take care of the precious end of the spouse. The funeral,
or memorial, dealing with family members, making sure
they are ok. People stay with them, family and friends.
And then it is all over. The end..........

So the spouse goes thru the motions of life. Working,
takes up a lot of the time. The nights are lonely and
empty. The grieving is lightening up some. And family
has gone back to their lives. And life returns to normal
for everyone.

Then somewhere, a grocery store, church, walk in a park,
maybe an old friend from years before.... some where, some
one enters that person life. Some times it happens in a year,
some times earlier. Maybe months from the death of their
spouse. Some one who you enjoy talking to. Some one
who you share a dinner with, maybe a movie. Some one
who gives you a hug, when you have not been hugged
by someone other than the quick ones from family and
friends. You feel the warmth of it, almost makes you
melt, you have forgotten how it felt. And then maybe
a little guilt, because you feel like you are cheating. Yet
tears of acceptance.

More dinners, movies and laughter, gosh you haven't laughed
in a long time. You start to enjoy your time with the person.
Look forward to a phone call, or a walk on the beach or park.
Things are starting to look up, life... seems to be starting again.
You feel free and enjoying life in all of its phases.

AND THEN.. some one ... family, or a friend, let's slip a few
words, of don't you think it is a little soon? What would your
love one think? Others are more understanding, and tell
you that your spouse would want you to start life over and
get on with your own life. You might have even had the
discussion with your spouse. Long good byes do provide
some heavy discussions, even if it is a short thought.

So, is it too soon? When will you know it is ok? Will people,
friends and family understand? Will they understand that
you have been wound up in sickness and death, lost of love?
Will they understand you are starting to feel free again. And
is that bad? How long do they think you should grieve? How
long would they grieve? Do they understand that you started
grieving in private when you and your spouse found out that
their illness was terminal? Don't they understand that you
still love your spouse? You still miss them with all your heart,
but you also know you have to go on with life?
It isn't about sex, it is about companionship...

I hope they will understand that grieving for 3 or 4 months is just
as acceptable, as years for others... especially when the spouse
has been ill for year or years... before you judge, try to understand.